Poem: MINDSCAPES - Adrift on the Seas of Chaos (Dark Ambient Spoken Word)

Poem: MINDSCAPES - Adrift on the Seas of Chaos (Dark Ambient Spoken Word) An externalisation of an intense, chaotic internal psychological landscape where standard reality completely dissolves. Written from an alexithymic and late-diagnosed autistic perspective, "Mindscape" translates the overwhelming sensory and cognitive weight of an undiagnosed mind into visceral, alien scenery. LYRICS MINDSCAPES Laying my mind open before the world. Revealing the terrifying vistas of alien 'scapes. Here the ordinary dissolves into lurid fantasy, Elusive fragments of some desolate vision. Nothing can be accepted as real, All things becoming, And unbecoming. Not being. Nothing truly exists, No stationary handhold to grasp, No permanence on which to rest. Blown upon the howling winds of eternity, Across unfathomable gulfs of possibility. Adrift upon the dust seas of chaos. Stars shining as bright as suns, Ebony clouds racing across electric violet skies, Chasing moons in their lightning passage. Bright skies casting scant illumination Upon a dark and empty land. Endless waves of umber dunes Stretch towards an unreachable horizon. Winds tearing the earth from its place, Casting it upon the whim of time. The desert swells and subsides, Sands heaving in groaning tides. The Earth breathing in stuttering gasps. Listen, and you can hear a world, Writhing in the throes of death. THE STORY BEHIND THE WORDS My work is an exploration of the perceptual barriers between minds and between mind and reality, written from an undiagnosed neurodivergent perspective but dedicated to anyone who has ever felt disconnected, stranded in their own thoughts. I wrote a lot of my poetry nearly 40 years ago, during my 20s & 30s. At the time I was completely unaware of the reason why I felt the way I did. It wasn’t until September 2024, at the age of 64, that I was finally diagnosed with Asperger's/Autism. Looking back, the poetry was my undiagnosed mind trying to process the intense isolation, the sensory weight, and the profound feeling of WTF! Decades later, I have finally brought these words to life. This is what it felt like to navigate a world that made so little sense to me long before I had the words to explain why. I can only hope that it helps you on your own path to self-discovery. HOW THIS TRACK WAS MADE The Writing: All of the poetry and lyrics are my own. I create the lyrics for the songs by deconstructing my original poetry. The Music: Yes I use AI, I have to. My poetry has sat dormant for decades because of an inability to express it in the way I wanted. I use it as a tool, it's my canvas and my brushes and I hope you see it that way. Suno.com was used for the vocals and music. I've tried to play most instruments over the years with zero success. Plus, I'm tone-deaf and wouldn't subject my worst enemy to my singing! The Visuals: Vizzy.io was used for the video visualisation. It allows me to handcraft them to suit the mood of my work. I didn't want flashy animated AI graphics, just something simple to keep the focus on the mood. I hope it works. LETS CONNECT Thank you for listening. If this creative expression resonates with your own journey of self-discovery, late adult autism diagnosis, or neurodivergence, please leave a comment—I'd love to hear your story. Any suggestions you might have for how I might improve the channel or the visuals are always welcome.