My First Kiss at the Altar & Vaginismus After Saving Sex for Marriage | Purity Culture

This video is about the sexual shame I experienced having my first kiss at the altar and dealing with vaginismus after saving sex for marriage. I also explain the mindset I was in when I got married as a result of being raised in purity culture. I share some groups that influenced my worldview, including Focus on the Family, Above Rubies, and the Duggar family. Thanks so much for watching! [Podcasts Mentioned] “Focus on Your Own Family: Response to Focus on the Family’s Jim Daly” by Bradley Onishi: https://anchor.fm/straightwhiteameric... “Weekly Roundup: The Problem with the Focus on the Family” by Bradley Onishi and Dan Miller: https://anchor.fm/straightwhiteameric... [Vaginismus] “Vaginismus Can Cause (and Be Caused By) Emotional Trauma, But Healing Is Possible” by Corinne Kai: https://www.allure.com/story/vaginism... [Purity Culture Resources] “Don’t Just ‘Reframe’ Purity Culture—Rethink the Whole Concept” by T.F. Charlton: https://rewirenewsgroup.com/article/2... “Give Me Sex Jesus” Documentary by Matthew Barber: https://vimeo.com/137784146​ "Purity Culture & White Supremacy" by Tori Williams Douglass: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6vr1... "Emily Joy Allison Wrote the Book on # ChurchToo | Exvangelical" by Blake Chastain with Amy Congdon: https://www.exvangelicalpodcast.com/e... "A Place in the Middle" by PBS Hawaii: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIQ5f... “Unlike a Virgin: Exploring My Sexuality as an Asian American Christian” by Emily Lu Gao: https://mochimag.com/our-voices/unlik... “How An Evangelical Dating Guide and Purity Culture Gave Me An Anxiety Disorder” by Hannah Brashers: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/i-kiss... "Being a Woman of Color in Purity Culture with Asha Dahya" by Bradley Onishi with Asha Dahya: https://anchor.fm/straightwhiteameric... [Timestamps] 00:00 - Purity Culture & Sexual Shame 00:42 - Religious and social context 01:58 - Focus on the Family, Above Rubies, & the Duggars 04:47 - My first kiss at the altar 07:22 - Vaginismus after saving sex for marriage 11:41 - Sexual safety in relationships [Background Music] Title: Hold Your Hand https://www.hooksounds.com​​​ Image description: Elly is white with brown eyes and shoulder-length brown hair. She is wearing a yellow shirt with small white flowers on it, sitting in front of a bed as she talks to the camera. There is a string of lights draped on the wall behind her. #PurityCulture #Exvangelical #Vaginismus #SexualShame #Quiverfull #Cult