Ragging Noobs - King of Clowns (Zendaqi Diss)

JORDANNNNN WASSUPPPPPP! Yeah, Zindakiii... I've been watching you lately, man. Heard you got a new king in the group. The king of feeding! Let's break it down. (Verse 1) [Fast, articulate multisyllabic flow] You log into Dota, you look at the screen and you think that you're nice with it But every single lane that you touch, the whole team pays a price for it You're playing support for the enemy faction, providing them action and giving them gold It's a tragedy told, a script is unfurled, you're breaking the mold of a player controlled! Let's look at the numbers, let's look at the stats, your ranking is honestly turning bizarre Three hundred MMR? Seriously, Zindaki? How did you get it that low on the bar? An easy bot ranks at six hundred, my brother, you're literally half of a bot! You're running in circles, you're losing your mind, you're missing the timing, you're getting us caught! And whenever Lashlash is talking his trash, you immediately side with his view Just hoping and praying he doesn't come over and beat up and bully you too! You gotta learn how to man up, stand up on your feet, put a fight up inside of the town You walking around like you rule the environment—a king without a crown is a clown! (Chorus) [High-energy, wide-eyed animated chorus] Zindakiii! What are you doing? The ancient is falling, the game is in ruins! You're feeding them kills, you're handing them wins, it's like a comedic theatrical sin! You're kissing the boots of the boss and the bully, you're losing your mind and your dignity fully! Zindaki, wake up, get out of the trap! Before I delete your whole game off the map! (Verse 2) [Aggressive, mocking tone, building momentum] But wait, it gets better, let's look at the corporate ladder you climb when you're playing the match You treating a matchmaking game like a job, every order he drops you are ready to catch Your manager enters the party, you bowing, you scraping, you kissing his ring on the low You thinking that pulling a camp in a lane is gonna make your salary grow? "Yes sir, no sir, whatever you say sir, I'll buy you a ward and a tang!" You follow instructions like you are a robot, completely forgetting the gang! He uses your body as bait, you're a shield, you're running right into the fire to save him You dying for nothing, you giving up streaks, because of the orders he gave him! I gotta be honest, it's looking pathetic, you selling your soul for a praise or a chore If you doing all this for a real-life raise in a video game—should I call you a whore?! Get a grip of reality, Zindaki, you tripping, you thinking the office is here on the screen You're just a delivery boy for the enemy, wildest illusion that I've ever seen! (Bridge) [Flow slows down, sarcastic and animated] "Hey Zindaki, can you come to my office? I mean... the bottom lane?" "Yes boss, right away boss! I'll sacrifice my life for your K/D ratio, boss!" Man, stand up for yourself! The easy bots are literally laughing at your rank right now! (Chorus) [High-energy, wide-eyed animated chorus] Zindakiii! What are you doing? The ancient is falling, the game is in ruins! You're feeding them kills, you're handing them wins, it's like a comedic theatrical sin! You're kissing the boots of the boss and the bully, you're losing your mind and your dignity fully! Zindakiiiii, wake up, get out of the trap! Before I delete your whole game off the map! (Outro) (Beat fades out, leaving just a faint, sad violin loop) Three hundred MMR... I think an actual rock has a higher rank than you. Go ask your manager if that death earned you a promotion. Lashlash ain't gonna save you when the ancient falls, Zindakiiiii. Man up. Clown. (Sound of a computer mouse aggressively clicking and disconnecting)