Ep. 18 | The Price of Nice: The Hidden Costs of People-Pleasing, with Amira Barger

“Wow! You’re so nice!” Soooo many of us have been raised to crave hearing those words. We’ve been socialized to be agreeable…amenable…accommodating. But here’s the truth folks never tell you (especially the ones benefitting from your niceness 👀): being “nice” can cost you everything. Your peace. Your boundaries. Your energy. Your well-being. Your power. Even your money. Being nice can leave you feeling depleted in every way. In this unapologetic episode of Space To Exhale: The Podcast, Lisa sits down with Amira Barger—Executive Vice President at Edelman, and author of the upcoming book The Price of Nice—to unpack the unspoken toll that niceness takes, especially for Bl@ck women and femmes who have been socialized to shrink, smile, and smooth things over; who have been trained to say “yes” even when our bodies and souls are screaming “no.” Together, they get all the way real about: ✅ How "niceness" became a survival strategy for navigating systemic oppression ✅ How people-pleasing disconnects you from your truth and your voice ✅ The double-bind of being Black and “nice” in corporate and community spaces ✅ How to distinguish between genuine kindness and performative niceness ✅ The liberating path from performative niceness to authentic power ✅ Why replacing “nice” with “no” can increase your self-respect Plus you’ll learn practical tools for unlearning chronic niceness, and setting boundaries without guilt, hesitation, or apology.