What an Autistic Shutdown Feels Like In Real Time

*Trigger warning* This video started as something else, then it took a turn, as lots of things do when you're autistic and ADHD. I tried to make a video about pastels, specifically my love of them and how much it annoys me that they are seen as childish. I was soo determined to get this video done, that I kept pushing and pushing, not listening to my body tell me that I had had enough, and triggered a shutdown. I had been filming the whole time. My first instinct was to delete it, or to to salvage some of the footage, but instead I have decided to put it out there. This is a scary thing to do what with the internet being like it is and all, but I think its important information, and hopefully my experience can help someone else feel seen, respected, and understood.