Let's Talk Adult ADHD Diagnosis, Marriage, and Gender Roles!

What does it mean to have realistic expectations of a spouse with ADHD? How does gender play into how ADHD impacts a relationship? And what do accommodations actually look like—versus what do they not look like in a healthy marriage? This week Rebecca talks about her own diagnosis of ADHD with her father Keith (a pediatrician) and good friend Daniel Forsythe (a licensed psychotherapist who works with neurodiverse marriages frequently) to dig down to discuss what the evidence actually says is possible, the risk of “caregiver burnout”, and more as Rebecca picks the brains of the actual professionals so we can all land in an evidence-based place! *THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR* To Heal or Harm: Scripture's Use as Poison or Medicine for Abuse Survivors by Dr. Steven Tracy. How to refute it when Bible verses are weaponized! https://amzn.to/4rSYkZu *TO SUPPORT US* Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work   / baremarriage   Donate through the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation: https://baremarriage.com/give-through... And check out our Merch, or any of our courses! https://sheilawraygregoire.com/shop/ SIGN UP for our weekly emails--Rebecca writes them, and they're amazing! https://baremarriage.com/join-the-new... *LINKS MENTIONED* Study regarding impact of ADHD on women versus men in adulthood: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles... Write-up on how we falsely believe that ADHD is easier on women: https://www.additudemag.com/gender-di... Study on how a messy home impacts women versus men’s social standing: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full... The Marriage You Want book: https://amzn.to/4hfKKdk Is It You, Me, or Adult ADHD? https://amzn.to/4lHAEpg A more therapeutic book about counselling practices for marriages working with ADHD: https://amzn.to/40Ajd02 *TIMELINE* 00:00 Rebecca has ADHD—what does that mean for us at Bare Marriage? 12:00 How do ADHD and gender intersect in marriage? 20:26 What does “accommodation” actually mean? 30:15 Common issues in marriage counselling and ADHD (with Dan Forsythe) 34:50 Is the ADHD zoning out during conversations OK? 43:50 Can it be an accommodation to have dedicated “mess” spaces in the house? 54:40 Is it an appropriate accommodation to expect your spouse to manage your emotions in hard conversations? 1:03:10 Can it be an accommodation to have “safe words” for conflict with rejection sensitive ADHD spouses? 1:09:10 Balancing gentleness with accountability—not ignoring the needs of the neurotypical spouse 1:14:27 Medication’s benefits for ADHD