„Dzieci są wymagające". Czy związki bezdzietne z wyboru są szczęśliwsze? | Porozmawiajmy o miłości 7

Love between two people can be beautiful, full of passion, closeness, and mutual fascination. But what happens when a child arrives? Does parenthood strengthen the bond, or does it become one of the first tests for a couple? "Relationships with children are much more difficult to maintain at a good level of personal pleasure," says the psychologist in an interview with Joanna Olekszyk in episode 7 of the podcast "Let's Talk About Love with Ewa Woydyłło." In episode 7 of the podcast, Joanna Olekszyk and Ewa Woydyłło examine how parenthood affects love. Are childless couples happier by choice? What pitfalls await couples in the first years after the birth of a child? And what can be done to avoid losing each other on this journey? "The pleasures end, the difficulties begin," says the expert. How can you nurture a relationship when everyday life becomes full of responsibilities and challenges? Let's Invite Our Children A child isn't an obstacle to a relationship—it can be a new value if we consciously "invite" them into the relationship. How should we understand this? It's about treating a child not as an obligation, but as a natural participant in family life, giving parents the opportunity to grow and experience new experiences. "A child is always a potential source of happiness," the psychologist reminds. You need to have a child together, not separately. "One of the first tests for a couple is the moment a child arrives," notes Ewa Woydyłło. And indeed, many relationships undergo a profound transformation at that time. Infatuation and spontaneity give way to new roles: mother and father. Not everyone is ready for this, and unequal involvement in childcare can lead to frustration and conflict. "In our culture, fathers show the least support with children, but fortunately, this is changing," says the psychologist. A common mistake parents make is to "divide the responsibilities" so that one parent takes on all the care for the child, while the other remains an observer. However, as Woydyłło emphasizes, "you have to have a child together, not separately." Shared responsibility, support, and building closeness are key to ensuring that the new situation doesn't weaken the bond between partners. When Love Turns into Disappointment However, the birth of a child can sometimes highlight differences between partners that were previously invisible. "I fell in love, but when I met him, I didn't like him at all"—this phrase might come from many people who, only after the birth, saw the other side of their partner—their way of handling responsibilities, their level of commitment, and their emotional availability. This is a moment when love can be tested, but also take on new meaning—if both approach this change consciously. Can Parents Be Happy? Many myths have arisen around parenthood. One of them is the belief that children always hold a relationship together and are a source of only positive emotions. Meanwhile, Woydyłło notes that "relationships with children are much more difficult to maintain at a good level of personal pleasure." This means that work is necessary – both on the relationship and on yourself. "If you are in harmony with yourself, you experience something we call satisfaction," the psychologist emphasizes. Criticism Helps Neither Us nor the Children One of the greatest challenges of parenting is communication skills – both with your partner and your child. "If I don't like criticism, then criticizing a child won't help them either," Woydyłło reminds, emphasizing the importance of building positive role models in the family. Mutual support, mutual appreciation, and avoiding negative messages are the foundations of a healthy relationship. Is it possible to successfully combine the roles of parent and lover? How can you nurture passion when diapers and sleepless nights reign supreme at home? What challenges await couples in the coming years of living with children? You can hear all about this in the latest episode of the podcast "Let's Talk About Love with Ewa Woydyłło." About the Host Joanna Olekszyk – journalist and editor-in-chief of Zwierciadło magazine. For years, she has been researching psychology, interpersonal relationships, and spirituality. In her interviews, she asks insightful questions that inspire reflection and a deeper perspective on life. About the Expert Ewa Woydyłło – psychologist, psychotherapist, and author of books on the psychology of relationships, addiction, and personal development. For years, she has been providing psychological support, conducting lectures and workshops, inspiring people to build conscious and healthy relationships.