freebc - help! (Full EP)

I am back. I will soon retire to my master bedroom for a much needed rest, but I'll update briefly on the goings on of the last few hours, as the French authorities continue to search my estate for evidence. As you know, I was taken from my chateau in a kidnapping fashion over 3 weeks ago. Much misinformation was spread about my whereabouts. I was spotted giving the queen of England a sultry back rub off the shores of Cape Horn etc etc these reports sound plausible but are FALSE. Rather I was hastily stuffed into a 4x4 chamber of my cheese cave by Delphine O. DuLambloise, a known associate of one of the nemeses, Wolfgang Puck. Puck has been trying to do me in for years and nearly had me if it wasn't for my beloved truffle pig Hans. You see, Puck had orchestrated an elaborate scheme to frame Brother Luck, Top Chef contestant and friend as my would-be killer. Brother Luck and I have history.... but we've since become amicable as I've aged and the wounds of our behind the scenes scuffle on the set of Top Chef have healed. A story for another day. Delphine O. DuLambloise had successfully held Brother Luck captive and forced him to make a confession video, but they forgot one crucial detail. Ever since my kidnapping years ago by the cartels, when I was forced to work as El Chapo's personal chef, I stuff truffles into my crevices each morning. 1 pound of truffles to be exact. I put them in all my openings, unseen, yet able to be smelled by my truffle pig Hans. It's a dead man's switch. A bit of an old-school GPS for my Hans. Well, after 3 weeks, Hans burrowed from his pen, followed the sent of my 1 pound of truffles hidden in my hind quarters and such and found me, barely alive, lying left for dead in my moist chamber (this is a secret area of my cheese cave reserved for my moist, delicate cheeses). I survived for 3 weeks on nothing but mozzarella and an especially brutish bleu. No recipe today, I must retire as I'm quite weak. More to come as I regain my strength. Peace, Love, and Demi Glace, Chef Pierre LeClam Song #1 0:00 Song #2 1:52 Song #3 3:23 Song #4 5:45 Buy this recipe: https://freebc.bandcamp.com/album/help [email protected]