The “Too Much” Wound Makes You Shrink | Core Wounds Part 4

The “too much” wound does not just make you feel emotional. It makes you shrink. You start editing yourself. You soften your needs. You hide your truth. You say “it’s fine” when it is not fine. You pretend the inconsistency does not affect you. You become low-maintenance so someone else does not feel pressured. The wound says: “If I need too much, they will leave.” “If I feel too much, they will shut down.” “If I ask for too much, they will call me needy.” “If I tell the truth, I will lose the connection.” But sometimes your needs are not too much. Sometimes you are bringing normal relational needs to someone who has too little capacity to meet them. Wanting communication is not too much. Wanting consistency is not too much. Wanting clarity is not too much. Wanting repair is not too much. Wanting emotional presence is not too much. In Core Wounds Part 4, we go deeper into how the “too much” wound creates self-silencing, people-pleasing, fawning, shrinking, emotional editing, and self-abandonment in relationships. Inside the Differentiated Secure Method, this is the work: learning to regulate your activation without silencing your truth, so you can bring your needs forward from a secure place. Healing is not becoming needless. Healing is learning that you do not have to make yourself smaller to be worthy of staying. #toomuchwound #corewounds #corewoundhealing #attachmenthealing #attachmentwounds #attachmenttrauma #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmenthealing #anxiouspreoccupied #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmenthealing #traumabond #traumabondhealing #relationshipanxiety #emotionalabandonment #fearofabandonment #abandonmentwound #notenoughwound #selfworth #selfworthhealing #selfabandonment #peoplepleasing #fawnresponse #fawning #emotionalneeds #relationshipneeds #boundaries #boundarywork #emotionalunavailability #breadcrumbing #intermittentreinforcement #anxiousavoidanttrap #breakuphealing #healingafterbreakup #ghosting #nocontact #nervoussystemregulation #somatichealing #emotionalregulation #relationshiphealing #attachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #differentiatedsecuremethod #DSMattachmenthealing #BenjaminStone #TheCoherentBodyLab