Triangulation: The Manipulation Tactic Hurting Your Marriage (EP101)

Triangulation: The Manipulation Tactic Hurting Your Marriage | Episode 101 Welcome back to Change the Odds, the podcast where marriage and family were never meant to be a game of chance! In this solo episode, Kevin A. Thompson breaks down a massive psychological concept that plays out in almost every family on a weekly basis—usually without anyone realizing it: Triangulation. When conflict, tension, or disconnection arises in a relationship, the healthy response is always direct communication. But because direct conflict can feel incredibly high-anxiety, we often unconsciously look for an "escape hatch" to offload that emotional pressure. We go sideways instead of direct, pulling in a third party to stabilize our own discomfort. In this episode, Kevin unpacks the hidden mechanics of triangulation, using a powerful, real-world family example. He sheds light on how we mistakenly use our children as emotional buffers, how couples mistakenly "scapegoat" a child's behavior to create a false sense of unity, and the heavy toll it takes on extended family, friendships, and even our careers. In this episode, you’ll learn: The Definition of Triangulation: Why pulling a third party into a two-person conflict feels comforting but is inherently damaging. The "Crock-Pot Jiggler" Analogy: How to read the emotional pressure cooker in your home and self-soothe instead of offloading anxiety onto others. Protecting Your Kids: Why drawing a hard emotional boundary around your children—regardless of whether they are 6, 16, or 46—is crucial for their mental health. The #1 Boundary Question: The exact sentence to use at work or at home to stop yourself from being pulled into someone else’s toxic triangle. Closing the Side Doors: Practical action steps to stop venting unproductively and start resolving conflict head-on. Healthy families go direct. Unhealthy families go sideways. It’s time to close the side doors and change the odds for your relationship. 🔔 Connect & Subscribe: Subscribe to the Podcast: Hit that subscribe button and turn on notifications so you never miss an episode! Leave a Review: If this episode was meaningful to you, please like, subscribe, and share it on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube to help bypass the algorithm and reach others who need it! Join the Community: Sign up for the official Change the Odds newsletter for exclusive weekly updates, resources, and relationship insights. 📚 Resources Mentioned: Check out Kevin’s book, Stay in Your Lane, for a deeper dive into relational boundaries and navigating parent/in-law dynamics. #ChangeTheOdds #MarriageAdvice #RelationshipBoundaries #FamilyDynamics #ConflictResolution #ParentingTips #Triangulation