Ask Me Nothing (I Just Hit Things) | D&D Barbarian Anthem | Celtic Punk Rock

The lock has a magic ward? Hit it. The horde wants to negotiate? Hit it. Tonight a barbarian takes the tavern floor and explains her entire strategy in one line. 🍺 Welcome to The Gilded Griffin Tavern! Pull up a stool by the hearth. Tonight's song is a celtic punk fantasy rock anthem: distorted power chords, thunderous drums, fiddle bursts stabbing through the chorus, and a fierce raspy barbarian lead with a taproom full of adventurers roaring it back. "Saffron here — I keep the mugs full and the fire high at the Gilded Griffin. Tonight's singer has already broken two chairs and flipped one table. The table goes on her tab." 🍺 Best Enjoyed With: • A mug of the strongest ale on the board • Your party's barbarian — they've earned an anthem • A table you don't mind seeing flipped 🎻 Perfect for: • D&D / TTRPG session music & combat prep • Barbarian character playlists • Fantasy workout & pump-up energy • Celtic punk and medieval rock playlists 📜 LYRICS [Verse 1] The wizard says the lock's got a magic ward I say a door's a door, so I hit it hard The rogue was halfway through his clever plan I was already through the wall before it began The bard wants to negotiate with the horde I only know one word and it's not a word It's the sound the table makes when I flip it twice Don't ask my intelligence score, it isn't nice [Chorus] Ask me nothing, I just hit things Don't need a reason, don't need strings The plan's too long, so here's my pitch I hit it till it stops, and that's my schtick Ask me nothing, I just hit things [Verse 2] The DM said "roll for insight," I rolled a one I thought that meant I hit it twice as hard, for fun The cleric's out of healing, so I drink and stand Apparently that's not how hit points work, my friend [Chorus] Ask me nothing, I just hit things Don't need a reason, don't need strings The plan's too long, so here's my pitch I hit it till it stops, and that's my schtick Ask me nothing, I just hit things [Bridge] They ask me for a battle plan complete I say "advance," they say "that's incomplete" [Chorus] Ask me nothing, I just hit things Don't need a reason, don't need strings The plan's too long, so here's my pitch I hit it till it stops, and that's my schtick Ask me nothing, I just hit things [Final Chorus] Ask me nothing, I just hit things The plan's too long, so here's my pitch Ask me nothing — I just hit things --- 🪶 Saffron wants to know: what's the most ridiculous problem your party's barbarian ever solved by hitting it? Tell us below — the griffin keeps a list. 🔔 New songs every week at The Gilded Griffin Tavern. Subscribe and keep your seat by the fire. 🎶 Music & Production: The Gilded Griffin Tavern + Suno (AI-assisted) 🎨 Artwork & Design: The Gilded Griffin Tavern (AI-assisted) 📜 Composition, Concept & Direction: The Gilded Griffin Tavern No copyrighted material used. Original tracks only. #DnD #BarbarianSong #TavernMusic #CelticPunk #FantasyRock #Bardcore #TTRPG #DnDMusic #FantasyPunk