Everything's Perfect Except...What Counts as Cheating?

Ghosting. Open relationships. Bathroom kisses. Where does cheating actually begin? This week's Phone a Friend takes Autumn and Donald somewhere they never expected. A married couple from Mentor, Ohio writes in about navigating an "open relationship-ish" dynamic that's built on honesty... but constantly derailed by ghosting, mixed signals, and trying to find someone who actually fits into their relationship. Along the way, Donald learns a new term—ethical non-monogamy—and the conversation turns into an honest look at how modern relationships really work. Then another letter changes everything. After a night of drinking, one listener shares that she and a female friend kissed in a bathroom at a house party. Both women have boyfriends. Now she's questioning what it meant, whether it counts as cheating, and what she's supposed to do next. Autumn and Donald tackle questions about boundaries, honesty, bisexuality, jealousy, open relationships, emotional fidelity, and why the hardest conversations are often the ones we avoid having with the people we love most. Donald also opens up about the first kiss that completely changed the direction of his life, while Autumn explains why boundaries only work when everyone actually knows what they are. If you've ever wondered: Is kissing someone else cheating? Can open relationships actually work? What's the difference between ethical non-monogamy and an open relationship? Should every mistake be confessed? How do couples build trust instead of jealousy? . ..this episode is for you. Send us your Phone a Friend Have something you'd like Autumn and Donald to unpack? Email: [email protected] Subject Line: Phone a Friend Follow the show: Instagram: @everythingsperfectofficial  @autumncalabrese @donaldstamper Shop official merch: everythingsperfect.com Time Stamps 0:00 The neighbors' backyard rave interrupts the podcast 0:46 An "open-ish" couple asks why everyone keeps ghosting them 2:41 Finding a third isn't as easy as people think 5:14 The guy from Italy who disappeared 7:53 Where does the third person actually fit? 10:39 Is sexuality something people choose? 12:06 Where couples actually meet people 15:39 Dating vs. playing: what's the difference? 16:28 Donald learns what "ethical non-monogamy" means 19:18 A drunken bathroom kiss changes everything 21:06 Autumn: "Yes, that's cheating." 26:48 Donald shares the kiss that changed his life 28:50 Should every mistake be confessed? 31:50 The conversation you need before talking to your partner 36:20 When TV sparks unexpected curiosity 39:23 Double standards around sexuality 42:52 Sexuality exists on a spectrum 46:18 Why hiding parts of yourself damages relationships 48:11 What real security looks like between partners 51:24 "Can I kiss you?" — the respectful question that stood out 56:08 Send us your Phone a Friend!