I Gambled On A Fart - Bobo Bojangles (rare 1960's soul vinyl)

'I Gambled On A Fart' was a vinyl release in June 1961 by the obscure soul singer Bobo Bojangles. A soulful tale of bad judgement and ill fortune, this disc had no better luck when it came to record sales and the song failed to chart. -- Well it was poker night at the bingo club They’d served up hot beef casserole I had my lucky chair, felt ten feet tall I was up two bucks and on a roll But in a turn of events my luck went bad My guts went wild from the beef I had I risked a fart to clear my head But I filled my pants with shit instead I gambled on a fart And I lost everything Yeah I took a chance on my underpants, But my ass went all in I gambled on a fart And I paid a messy price Should’ve walked to the john, should’ve held it in But the devil rolled them dice There was silence in the room, then a scream, Someone yelled, “Good God, he done spilled the beans!” The dealer dropped the cards in horror and fear, As I waddled out dropping shit from my rear Ernie slipped on my crap near the snack buffet Now I’m banned from Tuesday poker games Had to burn my pants in shame Only got myself to blame I gambled on a fart… And it blew up in my face All I wanted was a gentle breeze, But I let loose a disgrace I gambled on a fart Now I walk with haunted eyes They don’t call me Mister Lucky no more, They call me "Mudslide Surprise" Let this be a lesson to you When the stakes are high, and the beef is free Don’t trust that bubble down in your soul Don’t roll them dice unless you really, REALLY know I gambled on a fart And the Lord said “NO, my child!” You tried to cheat the laws of man, And left that club reviled I gambled on a fart Now my story lives in shame So hold it tight and pray to God Or forever lose the game Gambled, on a fart Mmm-mmm