Tender Conversations | Live with Dr Kathryn Mannix | Club Sandwich

Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you. Recorded live at our Stay For Supper evening in Sydney, Sarah Macdonald is joined by Dr Kathryn Mannix — palliative care physician and author of With the End in Mind and Listen — for a warm, funny and honest conversation about the talks most of us keep avoiding with our ageing parents. Her big reframe: these aren't 'difficult' conversations, they're tender ones. From there it's a practical toolkit — take the armour off, hand the authority back to your parent, ask the questions that actually open the door, and learn the secret ingredient: being quiet. Plus: audience questions on self-care, siblings, the fear of loss, and talking to your own kids. Content note: this episode discusses serious illness, dying and grief. If you'd like to talk to someone — Lifeline 13 11 14; Griefline 1300 845 745; Carer Gateway 1800 422 737. WATCH MORE / JOIN THE CLUB: https://clubsandwich.community EMAIL US: [email protected] Chapters: 00:00 Dr Kathryn Mannix on the '100% mortality rate' 01:03 Welcome to Club Sandwich 02:43 'Difficult' vs 'tender' conversations 04:13 Taking the armour off: the surgeon story 07:39 Curiosity, humility, patience — and not rushing 11:48 The secret ingredient: be quiet 16:29 Denial, and the gentle way in 24:06 Working with fear: the questions that help 26:09 Anger, resistance, and repair 29:39 Boundaries in care talks 31:22 Look to the nurses 36:39 What not to say 39:33 Do they know? Catching the bus 43:44 Q&A: Self-care and marbles 47:38 Q&A: Siblings and distance 49:32 Q&A: Fear of loss / anticipatory grief 54:18 Q&A: Talking to your own kids 58:39 Q&A: When the family are on different pages 01:00:31 Q&A: Why the care system is political 01:03:40 A beautiful conversation Find Put The Kettle On – Vera's free guide to the five questions worth asking your mum or dad – at https://putthekettleon.com.au With huge thanks to Altina Drinks for generously sponsoring our Stay For Supper evening. Visit https://altinadrinks.com. This episode is supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care. Proactive local care that helps your parents live well at home. Less stress for them, less worry for you, more time for the good stuff. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsa.... This episode was supported by NSW Trustee and Guardian — wills, power of attorney and enduring guardianship, sorted properly, so the people you love aren't left guessing. Search NSW Trustee and Guardian, or call 1300 10 20 30. Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera (https://vera.guide/), helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone. Sarah Macdonald – Host and Executive Producer. Melissa Reader – Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer and Clubber. Justin McArthur – Executive Producer. Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au) Theme music 'Club Sandwich' by Sean Wayland. Hear more from Sean at https://www.seanwayland.com/ #clubsandwich #sandwichgeneration #ageing #ageingparents #death #palliativecare #endoflife #anticipatorygrief #kathrynmannix #sarahmacdonald