Ox4Real Monica's Son | Trauma, Healing & Knowledge of Self | EP91.

In this powerful episode of The Hurt Locker, we sit down with Ox4Real — also known as Ox Monica’s Son — to explore his journey from growing up in Warri, Delta State, Nigeria, to building a new life in the UK. Ox opens up about the culture shock of moving to London at age 9, the challenges of growing up under a strict African father, and the absence of maternal affection that shaped his early years. He shares his experiences of trauma after being shot in 2006, living with PTSD, and being sectioned twice — and how therapy, reading, and writing music became his path to healing. We discuss the stigma around mental health in Black and African communities, why he chose to speak openly about his struggles, and how his song “Make It Right” helped others feel less alone. Ox also reflects on the state of youth mental health, the impact of social media, inequality in society, and the true meaning behind his name — Ox For Real and Ox Monica’s Son — as a tribute to his mother. An honest, raw, and inspiring conversation about resilience, identity, and breaking the silence around men’s mental health. 🔓 Chapters: 0:00 – Intro Welcome to The Hurt Locker — opening conversation with guest Ox For Real. 0:51 – Roots & Identity Full name explained; origin in Delta State, Nigeria; growing up in Warri. 1:52 – Moving to the UK Arrival in London at age 9; first impressions, culture shock, weather, food, and new surroundings. 4:32 – Early Challenges Feeling lost; physical and emotional adjustment to a new environment; missing home. 5:50 – Growing Up with an African Father Strict, authoritarian parenting style; lack of open affection; lessons in discipline and resilience. 6:46 – Dad’s Struggles Father’s battle with depression and illness; observing resilience and its impact on Ox’s outlook. 9:53 – Discipline & Generational Differences Perspectives on punishment: how Ox’s own approach differs as a father today. 10:50 – School & Cultural Clash Being the new student, differences in family dynamics, and school as a safe space and escape. 19:53 – Meaning Behind the Name “Ox For Real” and “Ox Monica’s Son” — honouring his mother and staying true to his roots. 23:07 – Trauma & Mental Health Journey Being shot in 2006, developing PTSD, being sectioned twice, therapy and self-discovery. 25:20 – Music as Therapy Writing “Make It Right”; using art to heal; opening up about mental health publicly. 28:19 – Breaking the Stigma Why he chose not to hide his experiences; the silence around mental health in Black and African communities. 32:42 – Youth & Society Today Startling statistics on youth suicide; effects of social media; loss of youth services and community support. 42:46 – Education & Self-Empowerment Knowledge as a tool for survival; reading and learning while in hospital; how education shapes perspective. 47:33 – System & Inequality Observations on wealth, resources, and bias; how race impacts access to care and opportunity. 53:05 – Values & Authenticity Hard work, self-knowledge, and staying grounded: the difference between “givers” and “takers.” 1:02:55 – Race & Mental Health Services Experiences within the system: how being a Black man affects perception and treatment. 1:06:02 – New Chapter: Book & Recognition Writing his first book, receiving a literary award, creating from the heart, not for profit. 1:10:35 – Message to Younger Self “Everything will be all right” and “Believe in yourself more” — the lessons he wishes he had known sooner. 1:12:57 – Closing Final thoughts on self-love, purpose, and the power of honest conversation. 🔓Mental Health Support If you are experiencing mental health issues, please do reach out for help - phone 999 for an emergency, or if you would like to speak to someone, call The Samaritans on 116 123. Please also check out The Hub of Hope to find mental health support in your local area in the UK. https://hubofhope.co.uk/ 🔓Guest information: Follow Ox on the following: -Instagram:   / _ox4real   -Facebook:   / ox4real   -Linktree: https://linktr.ee/oxmonicasson -YouTube ‪@oxmonicasson‬ 🔓The Hurt Locker Podcast- Watch on YouTube | Listen on Spotify & Apple Podcasts 🔓 Real stories. Hard truths. Healing starts here. 🎧 Episodes on most Tuesdays 🔔 Subscribe and step inside ⁨ @thehurtlockerpod 🔓 Follow us on Instagram & Facebook @thehurtlockerpod #TheHurtLockerPod #MentalHealth #MensMentalHealth #MigrationStory #NigerianDiaspora #BlackMentalHealth #TraumaRecovery #PTSD #MentalHealthStigma #HealingThroughMusic #Identity #Resilience #TheHurtLocker #OxForReal #UKLife #Parenting #SelfBelief