Todavía No Se Han Acercado Porque....... — Psicología Del Apego Evitativo

#AttachmentPsychology, #AvoidantAttachment, #Relationships, #Psychology, They haven't reached out because reaching out would require admitting there's something to reach out to, and admitting that, even if only internally, even if only in the silence of three in the morning when the coping system lets its guard down and the truth briefly exists unsupervised, is the level of exposure their entire architecture was built to avoid. It's not that they don't know what they feel. It's that they know exactly what they feel, and that's precisely the problem. The knowledge of what they feel is the threat. And you've spent weeks or months interpreting their distance as a lack of feeling when, in reality, it's the most proportionate response the system has available to a level of feeling that exceeds what it can sustain in a state of openness. I need you to understand something before we continue, because what I'm going to say in the next few minutes requires you to be willing to hold a truth that contradicts the most readily available narrative about why someone doesn't reach out when there's something between two people. The prevailing narrative suggests that if they don't reach out, it's because they don't feel enough. That closeness is the measure of feeling. That distance measures indifference. And this narrative, while effective in most relational contexts, completely fails when applied to the avoidant system because in that system the relationship between feeling and the resulting behavior is entirely reversed.