[ASMR] Measuring you for transmogrification

*** Open Me! *** You can find me being a huge dork on INSTAGRAM:   / cordeliacharter   You can donate (only if you want, of course!) via PATREON:   / cordeliacharterasmr   Custom and Patreon-only videos can also be accessed through my Patreon page. Check out the reward tiers for details if you’re interested. :) ---- You're interested in spirit animal transmogrification. I'm not sure you're ideal candidate for the process, but let's take some initial measurements during this consultation, shall we? (ETA: As some astute commenter noticed, this is VERY loosely based on The Lobster, which, aside from suffering from some pacing issues, was dark and funny and smart.) Also yes that is a Black Milk dress. I HAVE A PROBLEM. A GLORIOUS, BEAUTIFUL PROBLEM.