#135: I Didn't Ask to Be Born: Understanding Our Purpose w Rabbi Manis Friedman & Dr. Elad Ben Elul

On Serving God, Not Being Religious with Dr. Elad Ben Elul & Rabbi Manis Friedman In this episode of From The Inside Out Podcast, Rivkah and Eda sit down with Dr. Elad Ben Elul and Rabbi Manis Friedman on their book I Didn't Ask to Be Born and its core idea: Judaism isn't about being "religious" or what we need from God, but what God needs from us — asking daily, "What does God need from me today?" Ben Elul shares his Jewish awakening during fieldwork in West Africa, caught between secular Tel Aviv and an enclosed religious world, until Friedman's lecture "Why You Shouldn't Be Religious" reframed Jewish life as mission. Friedman traces this to his outreach starting in 1970 and its path to the book's Israeli success. They cover mitzvot, purpose, soulmates and marriage, hostages who found mission in captivity, teaching Tanya, Chabad's nonjudgment, and audience Q&A on dating, marriage, and identity. Get the book, I Didn't Ask to Be Born: Understanding the Purpose of Our Creation: https://amzn.to/4bxqnrF EPISODE SPONSORS Swimply Rent a private pool by the hour, right in your own city — no crowds, no chaos, just your family or friends in your own space, with over 15,000 pools across the US, Canada, and Australia. Download the app or visit Swimply.com — code INSIDEOUT10 for 10% off your next booking! BINA Bina walks alongside families from the moment someone they love suffers a brain injury, through every stage of recovery. Their campaign, "A World of Difference," runs July 19–21. Support Bina: https://go.jcn.io/BinaIO, or call 929-463-9100. Atzmi Atzmi runs evidence-based, Torah-grounded programs — including My Best Self — helping girls build real confidence and measure their worth by who they are, not the world's standards. Active in 80+ schools. Save the date for their ambassador's evening with Bracha Jaffe, August 30th. Learn more & register: https://go.jcn.io/AtzmiIO Ohr Naava Ohr Naava's "Just One Brick" turns Tisha B'Av into a guided experience — Eicha, the Kinot, an Ask the Rabbi segment, a video from founder Rabbi Wallerstein, and a lineup including Rabbi Fisher, Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi, and Charlie Harari. Join the live stream and support Ohr Naava's year-round work for women worldwide. Register: https://go.jcn.io/ONIO Shefa Living Women carry so much — marriage, kids, running a home, all while staying connected to Hashem and themselves. Nesheema sits at the heart of Mountain View, the new frum community by Shefa Living in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina: a mikvah, spa, gym, daycare, café, and shared workspace, built around kedusha. Mountain View is already 358 acres of kehillah, with the shul built and first families moving in this summer. Learn more: https://go.jcn.io/SLIO GUEST BIOS Rabbi Manis Friedman is a rabbi, author, and longtime emissary of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson. One of the most-watched rabbis on YouTube, he has spent decades teaching on faith, relationships, and Jewish identity. He is co-author, with Dr. Elad Ben Elul, of I Didn't Ask to Be Born: Understanding the Purpose of Our Creation. Dr. Elad Ben Elul is an Israeli anthropologist and author. After years of fieldwork in West Africa while completing his PhD at Tel Aviv University, a lecture by Rabbi Manis Friedman reshaped his understanding of Judaism and purpose. He went on to study and teach Tanya and Chassidut, eventually co-writing I Didn't Ask to Be Born — a bestseller in Israel — followed by Back to Innocence, on relationships and intimacy. Get the book: https://amzn.to/4bxqnrF COMMUNITY Join the Community! Connect with us on socials to discuss Episode 135, share insights, and continue the conversation: 💫 Instagram   / fromtheinsideout.podcast   💫 Whatsapp: https://chat.whatsapp.com/L0W4PRglR5B4kC 💫 YouTube    / @fromtheinsideoutpodcast   CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 08:01 Meet the Guests 10:08 A Spiritual Awakening 15:38 Africa and Jewish Identity 19:54 How the Book Happened 22:29 God Needs Us Concept 30:42 Anthropology of Mitzvot 35:45 Religious vs Jewish 39:49 Hostages and Mission 48:29 Love vs Need in Marriage 49:35 Loneliness and Divine Need 52:10 God's Humility and Romance 55:57 Soulmates and Marriage Reunion 59:35 Love as a Thing Trap 01:06:13 Love Idolatry and Cheating 01:07:52 Soul Journey and Resurrection 01:12:36 Rebbe's Nonjudgmental Lesson 01:15:17 Dating Is Not Relationship 01:21:15 What to Look for in Marriage 01:24:07 Mitzvot and God-Mindedness 01:30:42 Teaching Tanya at Any Age 01:35:03 Identity Through Action Closing