I Got the Chance to Apply for NYC's Housing Lottery - Here's Why I'm conflicted.

I got into the NYC affordable housing lottery through Housing Connect — a 1-bedroom apartment for under $2,000 in New York City. Among other buildings - after 10 years! Sounds like a dream, right? But after months of living in one room at my childhood apartment with my daughter, navigating my mom's health, and figuring out what starting over after 50 actually looks like… I'm not sure I want it. This is the honest, messy truth about affordable housing in NYC — what the application process is really like, what they don't tell you about how many applicants there are and why getting the thing you wanted can feel like a dilemma. If you're going through a major life transition — divorce, downsizing, reinvention — I hope this makes you feel less alone. Keep imagining. 💛 📌 RELATED VIDEOS:    • Starting From Here   🔗 RESOURCES: NYC Housing Connect: https://housingconnect.nyc.gov #affordablehousing #nycapartment #startingoverafter50 #housingconnect #newyorkcity #startingover #divorcerecovery #lifeat50 #nyc 0:00 — I got the letter 0:52 — Why I applied in the first place 1:21 — Tour the lottery apartment on the table 2:03 — Helping my mom out 3:01 — allocating resources 4:02 — trying to predict future needs 5:41 — Nespresso stop 6:58 — Life decisions - a walk in the park? 7:59 — live update from the NYC portal while making the video 9:07 — impact on others + creating sustainable relationships 10:00 — am I being selfish?