Avoidant Pulled Away? Here’s Exactly What to Say | Therapists Tehrina & Joel

When an avoidant pulls away, your anxious parts panic—and every instinct tells you to chase. But reconnection isn’t about chasing… it’s about repairing safely. 📥 Download the free Repair Conversation Worksheet -- https://mailchi.mp/ac7cf781d9e9/confl... 💌 Subscribe to our weekly Wednesday relationship email for therapist-guided tools and insights -- https://mailchi.mp/40beb00da0c1/mlsyk... ____________________________ In this episode, therapists Tehrina & Joel Terry share their Repair Conversation Framework—a step-by-step guide to help you reconnect with an avoidant partner without losing yourself. You’ll learn: 💬 How to prepare before reaching out (so you don’t text from panic) 🧠 The exact words to say during the repair conversation 💚 How to rebuild trust after distance—without self-abandonment 🔄 The difference between healthy space and damaging withdrawal ❤️ Why repair isn’t one moment—it’s a process that builds secure attachment This is Episode 3 in our 4-part series on Avoidant-Anxious Attachment & Repair. 🪜 Watch the full playlist: Understanding Avoidant Partners & the Anxious-Avoidant Cycle If you’re ready to stop the anxious-avoidant cycle and start building security, this one’s for you. 👥 Join the conversation in the comments—we love hearing your stories and questions. ____________________________ Stop chasing approval from the wrong people—start building relationships where appreciation flows naturally. 💚 🎁 Free Resources to Support Your Healing Journey: 💌 For more meaningful connections sign up for our weekly email: https://mailchi.mp/40beb00da0c1/mlsyk... 💝 Anxiety vs Intuition Guide: https://mailchi.mp/3f06e154ba94/free-... 💝 Conflict Repair Worksheet: https://mailchi.mp/ac7cf781d9e9/confl... 💝 From Testing to Trusting Guide: https://mailchi.mp/7409c99f8e5d/zp727... 💝 Boundaries & Attachment Styles Quiz: https://www.tryinteract.com/share/qui... 💝 Parenting & Attachment - Breaking the Pattern: https://mailchi.mp/aaffa367b10d/rq6qj... ____________________________ 👩‍🏫 Work With Us: Explore therapy, resources, and support: 🌐 https://centerforstrengtheningrelatio... If you've ever felt too much, not enough, or like love is always just out of reach—we're here to help you heal, connect, and feel safe in your relationships again. 🩵 ____________________________ 🕒 Chapters: 00:00 Intro 01:26 The Setup & Why This Matters 03:49 Phase One - Before The Conversation 08:07 Phase Two - During The Conversation 14:04 Phase Three - After The Conversation 16:58 What Not To Do 18:32 The Science of Repair 21:12 Let's Get To The Heart Of It #avoidantattachment #anxiousavoidant #relationshipadvice #IFStherapy #attachmentstyles #emotionalintimacy #relationshiptips #selfregulation #couplestherapy ____________________________ ✨ Internal Family Systems Key Concepts: 🔷 Self - The calm, compassionate, curious core of who you are 🔷 Parts - Different aspects of your internal system: 🔷 Managers: Proactive protectors that prevent problems 🔷 Firefighters: Reactive protectors that numb emotional pain 🔷 Exiles: Vulnerable parts carrying wounds and your natural capacity for joy and love 🔷 Burdens - Painful beliefs parts carry that can be released through healing ____________________________ Community Guidelines: Welcome to our community! 👋 This space is all about fostering healthy boundaries and relationships. Please keep comments kind, respectful, and on topic. To protect emotional safety: 1. No harassment, hate speech, or personal attacks 2. Comments violating these guidelines will be removed 3. Violators will be blocked We're modeling the boundaries we teach. 💚 ____________________________ 📌 Disclaimer: This content is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical or mental health advice. Always consult your own licensed therapist or healthcare provider for support related to your unique situation. © 2025 Center for Strengthening Relationships. All rights reserved.