How to Become HAPPIER According to the LEADING Happiness Scientist

Sonja Lyubomirsky​ is one of the most influential happiness researchers of our time. Sonja moved to the United States from Moscow at age 9 in the 70s. She went to Harvard and Stanford in the 80s and began studying happiness in 1989 ... longer than almost anyone else alive! Positive psychology wasn't "founded" by ​Martin Seligman​ and ​Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi​ for another decade. Sonja has published hundreds of papers including her ​Most Cited 2005 paper​ which defined the field by flipping a long-held assumption on its head: That happiness doesn’t follow success but causes it. Sonja is now following up her bestsellers '​The How of Happiness​' and '​The Myths Of Happiness​' with a new book called '​How to Feel Loved​', a joint effort co-written with relationship expert ​Dr. Harry Reis​, which is a culmination of 30 years of research that all point to one central truth: that feeling loved (not just being loved!) is a crucial ingredient of happiness. In this conversation we talk about the four horsemen that can ruin a marriage, what MDMA does to our brains, why small talk doesn’t build connection, the best advice for dating, how our brains respond to love, the single best way to feel happier today, and, of course, the eminent Professor Sonja Lyubomirsky's 3 most formative books. Let’s flip the page to Chapter 158 now... - 0:00 Welcome to Chapter 158 of 3 Books 3:23 Sonja's History with Happiness Research 5:57 Sonja's new book: How to Feel Loved 16:53 Book 1: Good Calories, Bad Calories by Gary Taubes 21:14 Inspired by Intellectual Courage 28:13 The Three Buckets of Happiness 33:18 The Most Powerful Happiness Booster 38:13 Book 2: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman 44:56 How to Nurture Relationships 48:57 MDMA and Happiness 54:09 Book 3: Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski 58:15 Emily's Question for Sonja 1:01:43 Sonja's Rules for Dating 1:03:26 Fast Money Round! 1:08:50 Final Reflections - SUBSCRIBE: https://bit.ly/2HHWPYg Hey there, I'm Neil and I spend a ton of time thinking, writing, podcasting, and speaking about living intentionally. I'm the New York Times bestselling author of six books including The Book of Awesome and The Happiness Equation. I've been lucky to speak at places like TED, SXSW, and Google. And I host a huge passion project called the 3 Books podcast. Want more 3 Books? Check out my top interviews with: Brené Brown    • Brené Brown - Interview - 3 Books podcast ...   Quentin Tarantino    • Quentin Tarantino - 90-min longform Interv...   David Sedaris    • Chapter 18: David Sedaris on holding happi...   Want to read more of my stuff? https://www.neil.blog/archive/ Want to check out my podcast? http://www.3books.co Want to learn about my live events? https://www.globalhappiness.org/speaking Want my monthly book recos? http://1000awesomethings.com/reading-... Want my articles on intentional living? https://www.neil.blog/newsletter/ I am also on the following drugs: Facebook:   / neilpasricha   Twitter:   / neilpasricha   Instagram:   / neilpasricha   Lastly, thanks so much for watching this vid. 👊, Neil [email protected]