Hiya (Shame) and the Fear of Being Judged: A Decolonized Look at Filipino Healing

Have you ever been told, “Mahiya ka naman” (Be ashamed of yourself)? Maybe you cried, spoke honestly, or showed emotion — and someone threw those words at you like a slap. In our Filipino culture, hiya is often seen as embarrassment or weakness. But here’s the truth: hiya didn’t originally mean shame — it meant relational awareness, compassion, and respect. Colonization twisted it into a tool of control. In this video, Dr. Nette takes us through a decolonized journey of hiya — how it changed under colonial influence, and how we can reclaim it as a source of healing rather than fear. In this episode, you’ll learn: ✅ The pre-colonial meaning of hiya and how it was rooted in Kapwa (shared identity) ✅ How colonization distorted hiya into obedience and silence ✅ How hiya affects the Filipino inner child — and why many of us still fear judgment ✅ How to heal “toxic hiya” through compassion, ancestral memory, and community ✅ The real story of the time Dr. Nette almost quit psychology after failing her U.S. licensing exam — and how that moment transformed her understanding of shame 🌱 Healing isn’t about erasing shame — it’s about remembering what it was meant to teach us. When we reclaim hiya, we also reclaim our dignity, connection, and courage to be seen. 🌿 Free Guides to Support You • Pagbabalik Loob: The Return to Self → https://thebrownpsych.com/#freebies • Navigating Boundaries: A Filipino Inner Child’s Companion to Healing Guilt → https://thebrownpsych.com/#freebies 💬 Join The Hilom Collective (THC) The Hilom Collective is our membership community where Filipinos across the diaspora and the homeland heal together through inner child work, ancestral wisdom, and Kapwa Psychology. If you’ve ever felt trapped by shame, silence, or guilt, this is where you’ll find kapwa who remind you: you were never meant to heal alone. 👉 Join us here or learn more: https://thebrownpsych.com/hilom-colle...