Monday Morning Mom

Dear Erin, My daughter signed her letter of intent in November. Division I softball. It was one of the happiest days of our lives — or at least I thought it was. Looking back now, I'm not sure whose dream we were chasing. The recruiting process started when she was fourteen. I built the profiles. I sent the emails. I researched the programs. I made the calls. I told myself I was doing it because she didn't know how — because that's what good moms do. We open doors our kids don't know exist yet. But somewhere in the last few weeks, watching her get ready to leave for campus in the fall, I've started asking myself a question I can't stop: Did she want this? Or did she want to want it because I wanted it so much? She has never once complained. She has worked hard and been grateful and done everything right. But I keep replaying moments — times I pushed when she was tired, times I redirected conversations about other interests, times I made the next showcase feel non-negotiable — and I don't like what I see. She's going. She's excited, I think. But I don't know anymore where my dream ends and hers begins. And I'm scared that she doesn't either. — Don't Know Whose Dream This Is in Nebraska