Donald J Trumpleton

https://linktr.ee/joncozart music and mixing by Corbin Sterling camera and lighting by Sarah Sharpe (u can also blame her for the makeup) writing consultation by Matt    / mat4yo     / joncozart     / joncozart   ~LYRICS~ How does a blowhard, bastard, son of a bigoted benefactor Host of the business equivalent of The Bachelor Pastor the party of family values and sin With flow so foul you’d think it’s shooting out the wrong end By song’s end he’ll hone his own brand A real-estate mogul just like his old man His pop had stole land from folks with no plans Made out fresh in the depression with Queens in both hands The floor plans to his mansion had 23 rooms Hired a chef to fill his five children’s silver spoons with fancy foods And ruined em’, his son was a fool, he put the brute into An army institute in lieu of high school Picture this: eyes full of fire, the heir to the empire Staring straight down the barrel, his future in peril, he barely made honor roll Dodged the draft, thanking his dividends Cause anything is possible with pockets full of Benjamins He grew in ambition, took a position as president Of his father's complexes for quote “Jews and Executives” But having never abetted a black resident He fled when the FEDs sued Freddy for prejudice He was desperate to shed his dad’s shadow and move on Standing upon the precipice of a brand new Don A Prodigal son rising to answer his true calling On the East Side horizon one name would glow upon ‘em, call him: Donald J. Trump My name is Donald J. Trump And if you think that I’m just having fun Well just you wait, Just you wait In a city so corrupt, Trump became a legend Leveraging vast tax cuts through his dad’s connections His mob lawyer would step in, with a sordid aggression Dunk his rivals in court fees then call up collections Grew addicted to the reflection the tabloids fed him Used a pseudonym to let the papers into his bedroom With his three wives, five kids, nine lives, and one mistress He watched his hyperbolic empire grow overextended He built a third casino and spent a billion on it And when the bankers came a’knocking he tried to solve it with histrionics Quadruple bankruptcies, straight Napoleonic Of his twenty two assets only three gleaned a profit There woulda been no one left to blame for someone less insane He woulda ejected from the game if he had a single ounce a shame Started diving in, siphoning several million off the back-end Fighting off the bankers to keep his debt from collapsing He cashed in the last thing he had to his name Staked his claim with The Apprentice, saved again by his last name Made his way into politics, claimed Obama was alien Told a lie so salient a third of us are still saying it Donald J Trumpilton We are waiting in our homes for you How the hell did it come to this? Is America just that pissed? The world is really run by d*cks His Bentley’s in the parking lot, see if you can meet him Making a trademark a week after Romney’s defeated “Make America Great Again”, say it just like you mean it [HILLARY/PELOSI] We fought with him [MCCONNEL/BANNON/PENCE/HANNITY] Me? I worked for him [AMERICA] Eh, I died for him [IVANA, MARLA, MILANIA, PUTIN] I f*cked him [CORONAVIRUS] And me? I’m the damn flu that got him [COMPANY] And if you think that he’s just having fun, Just you wait [BIDEN] What’s your name again? [TRUMP] Donald J Trump