Dr Eliana Gil on play therapy: the importance of safety & connection when those who love us hurt us

Warning: This recording may contain content that is confronting. Doctor Eliana Gil has been on a quest to integrate trauma informed practices with neuroscience and has studied attachment based therapies like the Circle of Security and Theraplay. Working with Dr Bruce Perry, with a background in expressive therapies, Dr Gil is an advocate for Theraplay (along with many of her peers from Dan Hughes and Besel Van Der Kolk to Daniel Siegal and Stephen Porges). We learn from her about Theraplay and play therapy and the quick wins, the long haul and the principles to follow. She reminds us that those who love us hurt us, and this is why children need time and safety to move on from past trauma. Dr Gil kindly shares with us real life examples of how traumatic experiences come up in the play, including examples of physical and sexual abuse, divorce, natural disasters, grief and domestic violence. She teaches us that play is a powerful tool where children can begin to heal by using metaphors. She reminds us that unwanted behaviours are not rejection, but questions and that you need to depersonalise them as these children take a long time to heal. A year is not enough for sufficient experience to build new connections in their brains. Safety and connection must be honoured. And the great thing is that by providing safety and connection, families can do things that help the child and the process of recovery. She reminds us it will not be permanent. 00:00 - Start 00:35 - Introduction to Doctor Eliana Gil 02:54 - How to help us understand the value of play in a play therapy 07:07 - Main principles: treat the relationship 10:49 - Have patience - one year is not sufficient to reverse what has happened earlier 13:00 - Behaviours are not rejection, but questions, so depersonalise unwanted behaviours 15:18 - Children bring trauma to therapy - an example of physical abuse 16:56 - Children bring trauma to therapy - an example of sexual abuse 19:39 - Remember the trauma behaviours aren't permanent 19:55 - Examples of the play 20:35 - Example of domestic violence in children's play therapy 22:54 - Example of natural disasters in children's play therapy 24:15 - Example of divorce in children's play therapy 24:55 - Start play therapy by discharging feelings and communicating using metaphors 25:58 - Example of grief in children's play therapy 28:12 - Quick fixes with theraplay 31:27 - Bruce Perry and the importance of coregulation and movement 33:25 - Homework and what can be done at home to help the child 34:54 - Where to find a theraplay practitioner 37:49 - Safety is the treatment for the child and connection is really, really important Transcript is available here https://www.pcafamilies.org.au/suppor... #Theraplay #PlayTherapy #Trauma #Adoption #Kinship #PermanentCare #PhysicalAbuse #Grief #SexualAbuse #Divorce #DomesticViolence #ElianaGil #BrucePerry #StephenPorges #DanHuhjes #DanielSiegal #BeselVanDerKolk #PCAF #PCAFamilies www.pcafamilies.org.au