母親との思い出にとらわれて、病んでしまっている人へ。どうしたらいいか？【精神科医が一般の方向けに病気や治療を解説するCh】

00:30 Reconciliation with your mother 01:45 Talking about your mother's life will help you understand her 03:08 What do you aim for by understanding her? 08:10 Why talking doesn't work Today, I'm going to talk about the theme of "reconciliation with your mother." Even though I'm talking about reconciliation, this talk is not about reconciliation in reality, but rather "reconciliation in the mind of the individual." It doesn't mean that you can go on trips with your mother or that you hold hands and get along. It means that you become less "attached" to her in your mind. ■Reconciliation with your mother's life will help you understand her There are many people who are so caught up in their feelings for their mother that they can't live their own lives and can't live happily. In such cases, it can't be cured with medicine, so you should receive counseling (medical examination). In that case, you may be wondering what to talk about in counseling, and one correct answer is that "you can help your mother understand you through episodes." Consultation: nth visit "Mother's life" n +1st visit "Mother and grandmother" n +2nd visit "Mother's friends/lovers (father)" n +50th visit "Mother's infidelity/violence" In the nth visit, I talk roughly about "my mother's life was like this", and in the next visit I talk about "my mother's relationship with my grandmother was like this", and next I talk about "my mother's friendships" I think about and weave together a few pieces of information such as "what kind of love did my mother and father have, and what kind of marital relationship did they have", and I work on creating a character image of "mother" by incorporating my own life experiences and making it into a story. After talking for a while, I look back on "mother's life" again and try to talk about the general idea again. This will help me understand "mother". I will understand what kind of person my mother was, what the role of a mother was, etc. ■What do you aim for by understanding What is good about understanding? The goal is to aim for this.・Others (distinguishing between self and other) First of all, they are "others". Even when we are parents and children, we are still other people. When we are born as babies, we cannot distinguish between self and other. We live in a world of unity where there is no distinction between ourselves and our mother, and by the time we reach elementary school, we spend our childhood in a vague state of being different. When we reach adolescence, we realize, "Huh? They are completely different from me!" And we gradually begin to distinguish between self and other. However, since we were originally one, we are somehow wrapped up in that illusion for a long time, and we cannot completely peel it off, so we can never think of them as other people. Of course, we can think of them as other people if they are not our family, but it is difficult to think of them as other people with our family. However, as we understand this more and more, we can realize that "they are still other people," "we didn't get along," or "we are too similar." ・Blood and instincts However, even if we say "others," we are not really other people. There is a "blood" connection. It is special to have spent a long time together. At least as a child, you have the illusion of oneness with your mother, that you are the same as her, so it is a special relationship. Children have an instinct not to hate their parents, and conversely, when they enter adolescence, they also have an instinct to hate their parents. When you understand this, you realize that humans are animals, creatures controlled by the brain, and that your emotions are generated by the brain. ・Repetition compulsion Repeating the strained relationship with your mother with other people is called "repetition compulsion" in psychoanalysis, and you realize that this is happening. For example, the same fights with your mother are also happening in your romantic relationships. ・Naturally stop going to the hospital This understanding gradually progresses, and as you talk about various things, you naturally stop going to the hospital. This is the course of mental illness related to your mother, and is the orthodox treatment. It's not that you can't understand her unless you tell her everything, and it's impossible to understand her everything, so it seems that there is a "compromise" for each patient, and the treatment ends depending on that compromise. I've heard so many different stories about "mothers" so far. ■Causes of poor speaking skills People watching this video may think, "Actual clinical practice is not that easy." So, here are some reasons why it may not work. ・Autistic and psychopathic problems First of all, it is important to consider whether the underlying disease is being treated, or how much understanding of its limitations is given. Autistic (ASD) is a developmental disorder, but many people have difficulty understanding o...