Chains, Culture, and Coming Home: Fiel Sahir on Indonesian American Shame

What does it mean to carry shame in your skin? Indonesian American social worker Fiel Sahir joins DJ for an honest conversation about shame, identity, and faith. Fiel describes shame as "chains" and traces his story as a third-generation survivor of racial violence — a dark-skinned grandfather mocked in China, forced name changes after the 1965 purge, and being singled out as "Chinese," including through the 1998 Jakarta riots. He shares how a multicultural therapist, the witness of Hawaiian Christians, and the conviction that "God is there first" pulled him out of shame toward hope and human connection. 00:30 — How "shame" is like chains that keep people bound 02:10 — Social worker vs. therapist vs. pastor 07:55 — How a therapist redirected him away from preaching into social work 10:50 — "Nothing is lost in God's economy" 12:50 — Indonesian identity inside an East-Asian-dominant "Asian American" space 15:55 — The 1965 purge and why many Indonesians carry Chinese heritage 16:45 — Generational shifts in how Asian Americans connect 19:00 — Indonesia's roots in India and China 20:15 — Where shame is felt most 21:10 — A third-generation survivor of racial violence; and skin-color shame 24:45 — Shame in church circles and family scrutiny 26:30 — a multicultural therapist, the witness of Hawaiian Christians, and "God is there first" 29:55 — Closing reflections; the "three H's" — heritage, history, and Hawaiians